Thursday, May 31, 2007

the etiquette of outdoor cooking

The Etiquette of Outdoor Cooking


After four long months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to spring and BBQ season. Therefore, it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this outdoor cooking ritual, as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.


When a man volunteers to do the BBQ, the following chain of events are put into motion:


Routine:


1. The woman buys the food


2. The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert


3. The Woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the Man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand


Here comes the important part:


4. THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL


More routine:


5. The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery


6. The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation


Important again:


7. THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN


More routine:


8. The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces and brings them to the table


9. After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes


And most important of all:


10. Everyone PRAISES THE MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts


11. The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off" and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women!


Tuesday, May 29, 2007

heirloom bonnet


Baby Bonnets

I am a little bonnet,
as cute as cute can be.
Would you ever guess a
hankie I used to be?

I can be worn home
From the hospital,
then again on Christening Day.
You can neatly fold
me and keep me for the Wedding Day.

Every bride must wear
something old – so you can
clip a stitch or two and
a wedding hankie will unfold.

If by chance it is a boy,
on the day he is wed
I can be presented to his bride.
Won't she be proud to use –
the bonnet he wore upon his head.



beautiful hankies


some old, some new


this is what I do will all the vintage hankies I find


a little press, a little thread, some ribbons and flowers

a special little gift for a new baby

I love this little blue one for a baby boy

the back is as pretty as the front


I added a pretty little flower to the back of this one


AN HEIRLOOM BONNET


I am just a little hankie, as square as can be;
but with a stitch or two, they've made a
bonnet out of me.

I'll be worn home from the hospital,
and on special days,

and then I'll be carefully pressed and
neatly packed away.

Then on the Wedding, I have been told,
every well dressed Bride must have something old.
So what would be more fitting than to
find Little Old Me,

a few stitches snipped and a Wedding Handkerchief
I Will Be!